Wedding of Clara Rajaratnam & Poopalasingham - 19 Jan 1945

The word for peace in the Greek original means to join together. The English word ‘peace’ is derived from the Latin word ‘Pax’; and the root from which that word is derived means ‘to agree’. We find the idea in the words ‘compact’ and ‘pact’. In the Greek word and the English we discover the same thought: joining, agreement; or to use another word, which is one of the richest in the English language because it is used in the realm of art and music – harmony. Peace is harmony – harmony in any set of circumstances. Think of different units – then of the merging of the different units. The result is unity. That unity is peace. It is agreement; it is synthesis; it is harmony.

Today two persons have joined together in holy matrimony. We have prayed that the two might remain in perfect love and peace together all the days of their life. It is our wish and prayer that the two souls should be knit together so that they might be one and not two. The happiness in a home depends on the extent to which two persons become united into one. The two who are united today are persons of good education and culture. Each has a personality. They have wills of their own. One of the biggest problems society has to face everywhere in the world is how two persons of independent thinking and strong wills of their own, live together in a home in amity and friendship without coming to a clash. Where a man and woman are of different tastes and temperaments and strong wills of their own, is not a clash inevitable? The more developed their personalities are, the greater seems to be the chance of a conflict. The result is that many a home is broken up.

In less civilised societies there was no such problem, because there the woman had no individuality or will of her own. As before marriage she had to give her implicit obedience to her father, after marriage she surrendered all her rights to her husband whose will alone prevailed in the home. That must have been the state of the society in which St. Paul lived, and so he exhorts: ‘Wives submit yourselves unto your husbands as unto the Lord.’ But today we find ourselves in a different state of society. We do not think it is God’s will that women should be kept under subjection. In the sight of God men and women are equal and women must have their personality developed as much as men.

In the task of building up a Christian home, men and women are equal partners. How then can we solve this problem of the conflict and clash and the lack of harmony that we hear of sometimes in the Christian home? ‘Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee.’ There can never be peace or harmony if each one wants to exert his or her own will. Both must bring their wills under subjection to the will of God. There can never be harmony or agreement if one wants to dominate the other. It is not a case of one submitting to the other, but both submitting to God. Both wills must be dominated by God’s will. If both man and woman would surrender their individual wills to God and be united to Him, then they will be united to one another. That is the secret of happiness in the home.

We have prayed that our young friends should be at peace not only with one another, but also at peace with the world. We want them always to have the sense of security in a changing world. We want them to have peace of mind and harmony whatever may be the circumstances in which they are placed. Though we would like their path of life to be always smooth, we must not be blind to realities. There are rough places too through which they have to go sometimes. There will be difficulties and hardships they will be called upon to endure. It is our prayer that they will have the peace of mind and the sense of security not only when everything is going well with them, but even when everything is topsy-turvy.

It is a mistake to suppose that if our world were free from trouble, our hearts would be free from disquiet. Although we do not minimise the importance of circumstances, perfect peace cannot reside in circumstances; it can only reside in the heart. We have perfect peace only when we have God in our hearts. ‘Thou will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee.’ Peace with one another, peace with the world, peace in spite of adverse circumstances can come to us only if our minds are stayed on God.

My friends, on this solemn occasion, when you are on the threshold of a new life with all its responsibilities, hopes and fears, the Church’s message to you is that you should have your mind stayed on God all through your life. The Church has provided various means by which you may come to the presence of God and have your mind fixed on him. There are the Sacraments, the corporate worship, Bible study and other means which you should learn to value and make use of increasingly in your life together. From the very beginning get into the habit of praying together, and in that way you will become united to one another and to God, and your life will be one of lasting peace and joy. May God bless you and fill you with his peace so that you may be a blessing to all.